why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
Come put a leash on your gf. She just challenged 8 cops to a wrestling match for 'tag team champion of the world'
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
The number of injuries I get impersonating Shakira while drunk is getting ridiculous. Sprained vagina, dude.
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
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