What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
i just fingered the ice cream at home instead of getting a spoon
been there done that
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
THIS IS AN AMERICAN HORROR STORY I CAN'T FIND MY VIBRATOR ANYWHERE WHICH MEANS I LOST IT WHEN I MOVED WHICH MEANS MY POOR VIBRATOR IS OUT THERE IN THE WORLD ALL ALONE RIGHT NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
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