i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
It must be a full moon weekend. All of my weird booty calls are coming out of the woodwork. I spent 40 minutes on the phone last night telling one why he is so creepy.
Just spit on a sock to clean a spot on my glass table. Oddest combination of so lazy and motivated ever.
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
she found me naked passed out on the toilet and i just kept repeating "i'm like elvis, but not dead."
I'm glad the dog doesn't judge me for doing leftover lines and watching George of the Jungle at 10 am
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
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