We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
he showed up at my house with a hand-stiched sweater that said "girlfriend?"
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.
You should probably take note of that and make it happen.
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
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