What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
My motherfucking vibrator ran out of batteries right when I was about to orgasm. It's like he's possessed everything sexual in my life and has compelled it to NOT SATISFY ME.
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
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