I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
Randomize
