Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
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