what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
I just want to let you know that when you try and lie about the "solid 10" you brought home last night, I've got a picture of her and about 10 reasons you should have left her at the bar starting with those martin scorsese eyebrows.
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
I'm "drunk text both siblings" drunk.
I made out with the hosts' boyfriend, infront of her, drank way too much, slept in my car and convinced everyone that I'm really a nice person. If that's not skilled lying, I don't know what is.
Randomize
