Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
Apparently I masturbate in my sleep now.
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
I think the fact that I stole someone's mail and broke my big toe means that I should consider taking some time away from vodka
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
Randomize
