speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
Don't forget to grab a pregnancy test and sloppy joe mix for tonight
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