singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
I feel like I just won at life, no connection sex and free 12 pack of beer after. Does life give out trophies, if so I want a big one.
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
I asked him if he wanted a pillow, and he replied "No. Batman never had pillows."
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
Randomize
