sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
I thought he was gonna sex me but then he ran to my bathroom and jerked off
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
I got asked if I was pregnant as a pickup line
They invited me day drinking but brought their kids. 3 two year olds and 1 11 month old. I was asked to change a diaper, I laughed and took another drink of this margarita. I LIKE CHANEL AND TEQUILA NOT CHILDREN. Can we make new friends?
The condom broke. Its OK tho, turns out I was just humping her thigh for 20 minutes. Jager dude, Jager.
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
She text me that night and asked how the dick was and I quote my drunk self "average at best"
Randomize
