This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
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