I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
life is all about the fine print - all i wanted was a fucking pony.
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
you did a full monologue with your sober self last night. different voices and everything.
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
Um...It has come to my attention that I may have said some rather vulgar things about Sean Connery to you and anyone listening last night, so...I apologize for that. I meant the things I said. But still. Sorry.
This drunk lesbian I just met keeps trying to shove sushi in my mouth. Help.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
He dicked me, fed me creme brulee, and didn’t make a big deal out of me causing a flood to come outta my vagina
Marry him NOW
It's 3 am. Nothing I've tried can get the taste of failure and vomit out of my mouth.
Randomize
