i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
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at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
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I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
ill drive you to the airport today if we can have sex first
i left yesterday
ill pick you up from the airport on sunday if we can have sex after
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