hey, what are you doing? my roommates are gone for the night... you should come over ;)
nah, i'm gonna grab some food
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
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