Just gargled Fireball to get the fish taco taste out of my mouth. Almost as good as gum.
I murdered the dance floor call the cops
Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
i now understand why vodka
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
Randomize