I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
Turns out your granddad is cooler than you. We're taking him on our New year's eve pub crawl instead. Sorry.
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