i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
Dude, if that was the MLB player I think it was leaving your bedroom this morning please tell me you got his autograph. It could pay the rent for like six months.
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
Randomize
