i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
Randomize
