I'm putting on too much make up bc I'm stoned
I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
dude you were so wasted last night you ate a sandwich made out of tomatos, cheese, doritos, salt & pepper. Then you heated it in the micro for 5 min to melt the cheese.
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
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