I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
Reggie can tackle my bush.
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
I would fuck him just for his dog
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
Randomize
