just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
I can feel you judging me through the phone.
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
His second form of ID was an emergency room wristband from an hour ago. What the fuck is going on right now
Haha yeah he had an allergic reaction to the alcohol earlier. He thinks that if he only drinks vodka he will be ok...
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
.......he just venmo charged me for the burrito I was eating while he broke up with me
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
My breath smells like gin and sadness
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
