True but thats because hes a fetus.
I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
A hard boiled egg and a shot of tequila is not brunch.
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
You need to call dibs on the blond with the tits. It's your birthday.
Haha hell yea
Because if someone gets to see those.. It should be you. It's like God telling you Happy Birthday.
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
Randomize
