last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
Get your ass over here, we're drinking Patron and watching My Little Pony. Patron and Ponies, do you copy?!
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.. I just figured you were drunk and needed somewhere to crash, but your no where to be found. I'll I have is this corn dog. call me when you get this. I'm worried! --mom
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
I turned off my domesticated goddess switch over 2 years ago and idk how to turn it back on. So in the mean time I'll dodge this gf bullet and eat free steak for as long as possible
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
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