Remember that night when i almost got you arrested? Is that funny yet?
Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
i drank out of a bidet.
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
Randomize
