is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
My Adderall prescription says to take my recommended dose and throw away any leftover pills. Why don't more prescriptions come with jokes like this?
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
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