I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
She's laying here with her head in my lap stoned, eating Doritos, whining about her boyfriend, and listening to Cher. Fuck the friend zone.
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
Randomize
