with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
Randomize
