omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
I drank half a bottle of wine while watching the Olympics opening ceremonies. I catcalled at handsome athletes. Stop me.
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
not ubering you a puppy
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
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