I wish I could punch you in the face.
we have pet lesbian snakes
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
I left myself a note saying 'buy a hamster but not an orange one like this pen'
omg so drunk
It took me longer to finish the bottle of scotch we bought together on New Years than it did for her to meet a new guy and get engaged
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
Woke up at my x's house. He said I talked about how much I love panda's for fourty five minutes. Then made him watch The Little Mermaid with me. Made the walk of shame infront of his mom. Things can only really go up from here.
Wait till you get home.
This is an alert from the drunk police: you have reached the point of no return. Text messages past this point are illegible.
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Randomize