Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
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