return my video game
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
My dad used the quotation mark gesture with his hands when he asked how my "roommate" was doing.
That may be because I drunkenly sent him a pick of you two curled up together like kittens. Two very buff kittens.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
I learned three things this morning. Don't get out of my car without my keys, don't let a girl paint my nail unless I'm getting laid by said girl, and lastly I learned how to break into my own car.
Randomize