is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
I'M GETTING MARRIED!
YOU'RE STILL MARRIED!
There is only so much cookie dough and masturbating I can handle in one night.
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
For one week of my life every time I pull my cock out I want the Jurassic Park theme music to start playing.
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
Randomize
