I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
I love how my cats smell like pot.
omg he fucking fingered me this morning. and i was just like this is the most awkward alarm clock ive ever had
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
They think I'm one of them. I'm about to get drunk in a Santa suit and bust down the door singing Christmas carols.
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
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