My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
as soon as I walked into work this morning, my boss called me out on my hangover, patted me on the back and said I'm getting time an a half for even showing up. Did I really look that bad this morning?
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
Me ending up in the fetal position in my shower is becoming far too commonplace. It's like a weekly therapy session
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
I got so drunk last night that I drunk texted myself. "hand jobs are the currency of the future"
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
I legitimately thought he died. I even called his mom at 3am and told her. Im done with vodka.
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize