whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
I just tried to drunkenly fart the beat of Disturbia by Rihanna
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
When theres a zombie apocalypse, i will be the only fat survivor. I ate chef boyardi ravioli with part of a pen for a fork
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
You thought they were asking for volunteers for a karaoke contest so you jumped up not realizing it was actually a "last 3 minutes boxing match". But you took that right hook like a champ.
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
Randomize
