He is an equal opportunity slut.
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
want me to make you a grilled cheese? I can't guarantee it'll be as good as yours but i'll go down on you afterwards if you want
brb printing out this text and putting it on my bedroom wall
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
Randomize
