True but thats because hes a fetus.
She said her name was "party"
And then a tiny penis fell out of my purse
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
Oh you have the munchies, Dad? That's great and congratulations on the weed but STOP EATING MY APPLE PIE
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
Randomize
