And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
Jealous. I want an iud. Maybe there's a late night bodega that'll insert one for me
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
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