Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
just wanted to thank u for shitting in my dads bidet last night. i had to manually scoop ur shit out of it. btw ur dumped.
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
I'm almost too hungover to function. Got into the wrong car by mistake. there was a rotweiler in it. Thank god he was more confused than i was for a minute.
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
my nose is crying tears of wow.
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
Randomize
