He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
Remember when we partied so hard that dude died and it cockblocked you hooking up with my sister?
I forgot that happened. That's the second dude that died on a vacation I've been on
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
I put on that one song on Titanic so he'd fall asleep. When I was positive he'd passed out in a drunken fit, he outstretches his arms and says "I'm flying, Jack.."
Randomize
