Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
He confessed to putting dry erase marker dots on my vibrator to keep track of when I "electronically cheated" and then passed out.
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
Come share oat with me in your robe
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