After 4 hours of foreplay he passed out and almost immediately peed in my bed. Naked. Like a fountain. Then tried to deny it in the morning by saying he just sweats a lot.
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
Can you explain to me the broken disco ball in my front yard?
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
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