dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
We've reached that awkward stage of the relationship where he's in love with me when he's drunk, but sober him is still afraid of commitment.
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
Left my card at the bar and had a drunk girl climb on the hood of my running car to scream at me.
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
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