So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
I can't open my eyes
Lol why not?
Because I have fat ankles and I'm drunk
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
you did a full monologue with your sober self last night. different voices and everything.
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
It's still 8am.
Yeah, but its wine drunk. WITH A DOCTOR. THAT MAKES MY MORNING CLASSY.
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
Excuse me. I’m a mature responsible adult.
You got your arm stuck in a vending machine trying to get fruit snacks.
I had a cast on my hand and if I paid for my fruit snacks, I’m getting my fruit snacks.
Randomize
