yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
Who spent today in nothing but a vajazzle and candy thong? SORRY NOT SORRY
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
He was imitating a sprinkler when he started puking. Hence- vomit sprinkler. Some people just can't handle their tequila
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
Randomize
