Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
Ok. So I've woke up in a hospital. New thing to top that.... Waking up and realizing you've been locked inside the bar by urself at 430 am and all the doors are locked by key
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
Randomize