I think tequila should come with a little jiminy cricket
i would really appreciate it if you would stop texting my girlfriend.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop cock blocking me.
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
Stop calling dibs on everything with a vagina you jackass.
That should be the title of my autobiography.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have so many feelings about this burrito
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
God, I missed his penis.
Randomize