I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
I am going to ride along with a cop tonight so please don't get arrested because that would be super awkward for me.
I'm out of town so we should be golden.
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
What happened to my knees?
You ate shit in front of the homeless people. They applauded.
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
If making out with three guys at once at a Kesha concert while simultaneously smearing glitter all over yourself doesn't convince her you're gay, nothing will
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
Randomize
