Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
Hey, this is a mass text. I have a hospital bill from November, and I don't know from what. Did anyone bring me to the hospital on a drunken night that I don't remember...?
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
Also, since I switched back to this phone I've found a crop of dick pics and your funeral arrangements.
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
Randomize
